Signs you might be suffering from depression and how to cope
The happiest faces could be drowning in sadness but still put up a veneer and are able to make others happy.
Sometimes one is not acting like their usual self and are unaware of it and it takes someone else to make them realize what they are going through.
Someone going through a challenging time can mask it by going out more, indulging in comfort food and consequently gaining weight and other avoidant behaviours. It sometimes takes a third party to realise what is going on.
Bethcarlos Mwende spoke to Wananchi Reporting about her battle with depression:
I suddenly lost interest in the things and people that made me happy. I created my own bubble and decided to live in it. I found joy in being on my own, putting my phone on do not disturb, assuming that the world has stopped and if I had anything to do, I did not see the need of doing it.
I found pleasure in taking alcohol because I thought it could cool my mind and help me imagine how good I wanted my life to be.
Bethcarlos says that it was at this point that she began to question her worth and wondering what could she have done differently and trying to understand what she was going through.
I wondered what have I achieved in my life? I would look around my peers and feel like they have all figured life out and as much as people say that it's not healthy to compare yourself with others, sometimes there is no way out of it.
You can't just act blind towards what's happening around you. I tried reminding myself of the good things that I have done in my life but I felt like I needed someone to tell me about it, and that's when I began to feel like my friends were not there for me, yet I had not told them what I was going through.
I don't know how I expected them to figure out what I was going through without speaking about it.
They say that depression is a mental state but it also shows physically. I was generally tired and weak, I began to add weight since I was just eating in the house.
I did not feel like cleaning my house, whenever I got out of bed and even manage to take a shower, I would feel like I have conquered, not until I just look at the mirror and feel like I have gained too much weight and that alone was enough to make me cry for the rest of the day. Very minute things would make me break down easily, I was generally emotionally unstable.
I could barely pin point what exactly made me feel like that, but I knew I wasn't okay.
Bethcarlos says that she knew she would get better with time. “They say time heals, but I came to realise that time will only teach you how to live with the pain. All this was from feeling unmotivated and lonely. I felt like I needed to figure out a lot in my life, I had academic guilt.”
I came to know I needed help when I began to lose meaning in life, I did not see the point of working so hard to achieve something yet it's all vanity, I decided to speak to my friend and she took me for therapy.
According to Ann Wambui, who runs IONTBO (It's okay not to be okay), a youth movement that advocates for mental health and wellness, here are some of the ways to cope with depression:
- Try finding the root cause of your problem.
- Avoid abusing drugs and substances.
- Try facing your fears.
-Stay in touch to avoid withdrawing from life.
- Try being active by doing what you love or you might discover a new hobby.
-Be around positive people and ensure you're watching things that are positive and won't give you bad ideas.
- Give yourself grace for the times you're able to do what was hard for you.
-Try eating healthy or going to the gym. Exercise is a good way of relief.
- Remember the times that you thought it was all over but you made it. It will encourage you to know you will get through what you’re currently facing
- Acknowledge your feelings.
-Try avoiding triggers.
Bethcarlos says she is doing better now. “I show love and kindness to anyone I interact with because I understand that even those who look happy can be sad inside,” she concludes.
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