JAMILA'S MEMO: An open letter to the new Cabinet Secretaries

My memo is to our 22 Cabinet Secretaries. You were appointed during a challenging period in this country. In fact, most of you would not have been in office if the people had not taken matters into their own hands. You were all not vetted and approved by Parliament. You were sworn in and given the keys to the ministries. The next step would be kuanza kazi, right? But it seems you are taking a bit too long kuanza hiyo kazi.

Well, it is time to settle down and do some work. Enough of the parties, homecomings, and handovers. Shukeni kwenye magari, ingieni ofisini na muanze kuchapa kazi.

Next week, it will be two years since this administration came into power; mwaka wa tatu sasa unaanza. In normal jobs, by now you would be asked, what have you done so far? What has your contribution been to this job? This appraisal has no room for homecoming parties or other excuses like "I was away on a trip."

The Constitution reduced this advantage of being out of the office by making the office of the CS executive, meaning they are not elected and so are free to work in the office. You have no burden to make appearances in the constituency. That responsibility was reduced and left to elected Members of Parliament.

There is nothing wrong with saying, niko ofisini, busy na kazi. The Constitution separated the Legislature and the Executive to give you more time to do the actual work.

In my casual count, last week we lost 4 days out of 5 that would have been spent working. You were busy attending rallies in Kuria, Migori, Kisumu, Siaya, and Bungoma. Yaani wiki nzima hamjakuja job... mko nje tu. In normal jobs, once you are back from Bungoma, unapokea memo, chap chap... for absenteeism, desertion from work, and a general lack of seriousness kwa kazi. Once you get this first memo, you are only two more letters away from being fired.

After the first note, you then travel to the Coast for another round of homecomings. Unaanzia Mombasa, kisha Kwale, Kilifi, Taita Taveta, Tana River, and then you pass Garissa on your way back to Nairobi. And when you arrive, a second letter awaits you at work - dereliction of duties, yaani kutotekeleza majukumu ndio yaliyomo kwenye barua hiyo ya pili. This means you are one more homecoming round of parties from staying at home.

Next, you travel to Rift Valley. Here, you have a better reason to party - the subject is, you survived the dissolution of Cabinet. Hii inamaanisha you will be slightly late coming back to work, 6 days this time. When back, you are reminded that this was your last warning, unapokezwa the last note.

This is what would happen in a professional work environment. Last week, there was a warning letter; the week before, you got the first one; wiki hii ya tatu imefika. File imejaa barua za kusomewa tu. The argument you will give is, tulikuwa na boss! But remember, you only report to the boss, but you work for the people of Kenya. Remember how you got into Cabinet in the first place - the people forced the other Cabinet to be dissolved. Remember you are like a rock of salt; any contact with water, you will dissolve. Ask yourselves, what concrete work, to serve the people of Kenya, did you actually do while attending homecomings and handovers?

Wacheni mchezo na kupoteza wakati. Get to work.